Save Your Marriage with These 4 Ways

You remember exactly how it started with your spouse. Everything was so beautiful. Is your marriage in danger? We will help you to identify the causes of your marriage crisis. The following methods and guidelines will increase your chances of saving your marriage. In this article, I will give you my best marriage-saving tips.

The reasons why people want to save their marriage can be very different:

• You don’t want to break up, only your partner wants to go their own way
• You have realized how much you love your partner and therefore want to save the marriage
• Separation is associated with great losses. Maybe your home and children are part of your marriage
• You are afraid of being alone

1. How do I save my marriage?

How can you try to save your marriage? That is the crucial question now.

You are certainly not doing very well in your situation. You are afraid of having to accept a huge loss. This loss is likely to be primarily in your partner. But children, the home of one’s own, and loss of status can also be further reasons for wanting to save a marriage. However, divorce lawyer can also help you with your relationship recovery.

I see an important step in turning off a self-fulfilling prophecy. Because we often head unconsciously towards what worries us most.

Maybe something like this has happened to you before: You are studying for an exam and you are well prepared. Still, you’re really nervous that you couldn’t pass it. It then happens in the exam: blackout. Failed! Your fear has come true. This phenomenon is called a self-fulfilling prophecy.

The same can happen to you in your partnership. You actually want to save your marriage, but you are so afraid of the end of the relationship that you are almost inevitably headed for it.

What you can do is at odds with your ultimate goal. But it works a lot.

2. Accept possible separation. But how?

By accepting a possible separation, you are no longer feeding the separation thought with your fear energy. This makes it weaker and less likely to occur. This can help save your marriage.

“But how are you supposed to accept that?” That’s nicely said, but nobody ever reveals how it should work – acceptance. Incidentally, this is because most of them do not know it themselves.

• “Just accept it!”
• “Let it go.”
• “Have no fear!”
• “You don’t need to be angry.”

We have all heard these sayings 1000 times. But they are of no use as long as you don’t know how to accept, let go, etc. work.

In order to be able to accept, we have to influence our emotions. But these do not play according to the rules of logic. You play according to the rules of psycho-logic.

I will now give you step-by-step instructions on how to refute the self-fulfilling prophecy. That will demand a lot from you. If it gets too intense for you, I recommend that you be accompanied by a coach. Now for the instructions. Take about 30 minutes and carry out the exercise in writing and undisturbed:

1. What’s the worst that can happen to your marriage?
2. Imagine it actually happens. How do you feel?
3. Now feel where in your body this feeling is located (in your chest? In your stomach?)
4. What does this feeling do? Just watch it without wanting to change it. (Does it pulsate? Does it spin? Does it vibrate? Push it?)
5. Observe the feeling without intervening – until it changes noticeably and flattens out. If you should digress, return to feeling. If you should have difficulties with the implementation, let me guide you .
6. Imagine again that your marriage was definitely falling apart and there was nothing you could do about it. What is there to regulate? How would you go on then?
7. Play through this scenario for yourself – in great detail. Go ahead in your mind until you have a new partner again.

Playing through such a breakup is certainly not a nice thought. However, the practice can also help you emotionally understand that even a breakup doesn’t mean the end of the world.

It goes on and on. Recognizing this often creates emotional relaxation. This deprives the self-fulfilling prophecy of its breeding ground and gives you room for maneuver again.

Taking energy away from self-fulfilling prophecy does not mean that it cannot occur anyway. Relationships are too complex to predict. However, if you fail to save your marriage, you already have a plan of action.

3. Nothing can be taken for granted

My favorite of the “marriage saving tips” is not to take your partner for granted. You can see that it is not him, otherwise, there would be no threat of separation.

If the relationship seems safe, it’s easy to forget. The partner is taken for granted and treated accordingly. At the beginning of a relationship, where the partnership is not yet established, a lot of attention is paid to the relationship design. In this phase, we know that he or she could also choose differently.

In fact, both partners can decide differently at any time. He could also be killed in a car accident tomorrow. Then sentences like:

“I thought it only ever happened to the other.”

The idea of ​​taking it for granted is more than fragile. You will probably become aware of that these days. To stop taking him or her for granted means changing your worldview, so asking yourself over and over again:

“How would I act if I didn’t take my partner for granted?”

If you want to save your marriage, you need regular awareness so that these thoughts can become a new habit. By thinking about it over and over again, you will plant a new habit.

4. Work on the causes

There are certainly reasons why your partner wants to break up, these can be:

• Too different views or misunderstandings
• Too much argument
• Emotional distance

I see the main cause of marital problems in the fact that the partners have never realized what they actually want from each other.

What do you want from your spouse?

If you don’t really think about it now, but just try to read on, your mind tries to dissuade you from taking a closer look at yourself. I recommend answering the question in writing. I’m waiting, too. And did you gain a little more clarity by answering the question?

You can also ask your partner to think about it. Then share it with an attitude of curiosity. You will be surprised that your partner may want something very different from marriage than you do.